Final Draft Formal paper # 2

November 25, 2012

Horacio Genis

133 Marin St

Watsonville CA 95076

Mr. Vicente Martinez:

Machismo (or being macho) is one aspect of Latino culture that makes it different from other cultures around the world. Different cultures see machismo in different ways, and as time passes a new way of machismo or shift of power has been happening. Machismo has different faces, and it can be expressed in different ways. It can be used in a good or a bad way. The good way of machismo is when a man is providing for his family. The bad form of machismo is when a man is abusive to his family, especially to his wife. As men move from one country to a different country with a different cultures and different societies, these men have the necessity of changing to a different form of machismo. Now a new form of machismo is developed in the new country and machismo takes a different role. This new type of machismo, women are more equal at home and work, and forcing men to see themselves equal as women.

Even though I have been living for a few years with you and my sister (your wife) I have seen the good of macho. You are the macho that does the right thing for his family and shows that he cares for them. I have seen that you don’t feel bigger than your wife our use that aggressiveness to show your toughness. On your day off, I have seen that you do laundry and cook because your wife gets tired from work. I have seen also that you do the grocery shopping sometime. You are presenting the good face of machismo and doing what many machos would not do , and might  think what you do is wrong.

The article, “The Latin American Family: Families vs. Machismo” by Bron B, Ingoldsby,explains the different characteristic of Machismo. Ingoldsby believes that the fist characteristic of machismo is aggressiveness. In order for a male to be considered a real machista man, he must show his masculinity, strength, and physical power. The macho man also has to make verbal and physical abuse to women and challenge men with fists or weapons. Ingoldsby believes that the second characteristic is “hypersexuality”. They scoffed at impotent and homosexual men. The cultural goal of machismo is to conquest women and the more, the better. Ingoldsby writes, “To take advantage of young woman sexually is cause of pride and prestige, not blame. In fact, some men will commit adultery just to prove to themselves that they can do it”(Ingoldsby). This shows that these men do not really have feelings towards women or care about what they think. They only see women as objects with no feelings. They do must of the stuff just to prove to other men how masculine and tough they are. They see their actions they do as things that will improve their status or are a trophy. It is sad to hear the way some of them treat women.

Machismo in some Latin American countries is the main barrier for family planning for example Mexico. In the article “Machismo Main Hindrance to Family Planning in Mexico” (MMFPM), explains that most Mexican men not only avoid using contraceptives, but they also prohibit their wives from using any kind of birth control. According to the article the article these men believe that if they use contraceptives it could diminish their manhood, or they can cause infidelity, a consequence of men not letting their wives use birth control or use the condoms themselves. Medical officials believe, as many as 60 percent of the women that go to receive birth control do it without the husband’s consent. The article goes on to state “… and health workers say that women who are found to be practicing birth control surreptitiously often face emotional and even physically abuse from their husbands(MMFPM). This shows that macho men would do anything to keep their manhood strong, anything to keep what is theirs safe or protect their family. It is clear that machismo plays a big role, in many Latin America countries which contributes to the population growing.

I believe that there are many ways to express machismo. There are people who don’t basically use physical aggressiveness to express their masculinity. Some people just show their masculinity verbally. These machos do not beat up their wives, but they impose many limits to their wives all the time. They only want the women to stay at home to cook, clean, and they do not permit their wives to go out of the house. They make women take care of the kids because they believe it is the women’s job. Some men are so jealous, and they believe that if they let them go out and look for a real job, other men will talk to them and their wives will cheat on them. I believe a perfect example is your brother–in-law. Your sister and brother-in-law have been together seventeen, and ever since they got together he has not let her work at a real job. He also does not let her or want to teach her how to drive a car. In the morning I’ve seen her at 5:00  in the morning preparing food for his work. I think that when he gets up, he only gets his lunch and leaves. Later in the afternoon when he gets back home from work he expects to find hot food and the laundry to be done. I have heard your wife and sister comment that he does not let her work because he thinks she is going to talk to other man out there. I have never seen him do laundry, like you. Like him, many other men still believe that the woman should only stay at home and do everything for the man. I think that they still think as if they were back in their native country or think like in the old times.

America has different types of machismo and different men decide how to prove they masculinity to other man or their own sons. The article, “Bros Before Hoes” by Michael Kimmel, explains who is considered to be a real man. He describes a set of rules that a guy must follow in order to be considered as a real man. Guys have to follow these rules and be tough to prove their masculinity to other men. There are certain boundaries that guys must not cross or they will be considered feminine. Kimmel believes that everything is psychologically developed in this these young teenagers and young adults at a young age by their father or other men in their lives. Kimmel writes:

As the barber prepared the boy’s hair for the treatment, using, apparently some heat and some painful burning chemicals, the boy began to cry. The barber turned to the boy’s father and pronounced. “This boy is wimp!” he went on, “This has been spending too much time with his mama! Man, you need to put your toot down. You have to get this boy away from his mother!”(615)

This shows how America fathers not necessarily use aggressiveness to show their masculinity and this is how most of the men are thought since they are really young to start like real man. Fathers or other people say that little kids should not spend time with their mothers so they will become real men. After my grandfather died I, didn’t really grow up with a father or have a model to follow.

After my sixth birthday, I remember my grandfather died. From then on I would not have a father or man to follow as a model. Growing up with a single mother was kind of difficult because there are moments when you feel like you can not tell a woman or talk about thing that u must learn from a man and only man can teach you. In all of my Mexican friends that grow up with a father, I see that they have a different personality as me. I also have notice that most of my friends have a really different perspective about women. For example they call girls sometimes bitches or they talk about women only when they talk about sex. As I was growing with a single mother, I never heard anyone around me say the words “bitch”, “hoe”, or “slut”. For example I believe that people developed an attitude base on what they learn from their fathers.  I believe that if I would have grown up with a father, I would have a different personality, and maybe I would be an aggressive macho because that is how most people are, where I came from. I also think that I would even dress up different and maybe talk differently, and gave a differently, perspective about the world in general.

As Latino males with machista immigrate to The United States, they find the new American society challenging. The National Compadre Network takes a hands-on looks at a key element of Latino cultural identity. The National Compadre Network (NCN) focuses on helping men with a “machista” problem who are willing to change for the better, for their children and wives. The NCN is trying to help pass on the message to all who will listen. David Aballos believes “How Latinos have been traditionally taught to relate to themselves, their family and community is different from the wider America society that they now see themselves ascending into”(CNC 6). I believe that most of the adults males who move from Mexico have a harder time assimilating in to the new culture in The United States because of their machista identity. At the end of the day the with the help of the CNC they recognize their mistakes and do right by their wives, children, and companions. They learn to be better fathers and husbands. These males become much more in touch with their families.

The Article, The Death of Macho by Reihan Salam, explains how in different cultures women are becoming more equal to men much faster than in other cultures. Salam explains that the economic collapse was caused by the failure of men. As a result of the economic collapse a shift of power has been happening. Women and men have becoming more equal at home and work.  As a result women in some countries in Europe, notably Iceland have taken the initiative to take control of their country. Men will only have the option to assimilate or resistance. President Barack Obama believes “Women are just as likely to be the primary bread earner, if not more likely, than men are today” (Salam 632). Power shifting can benefit both men and women. Women having real jobs will give them better chances to provide more for their families. Men helping at home will make it easier for the women with the house responsibilities.

Machismo exists in every culture, but it is seen different, and or acted out differently. I believe our culture is the one only one when aggressiveness is one of the main faces of Machismo. Other people use different ways of showing their masculinity but all must show it in some way. In some cases men have to change their macho way because of the new culture that they are introduced to, for the betterment or their families.  

Sincerely,

Vicente Martinez

133 Marin St

Watsonville CA 95076